The past cannot be changed, only the future. Some say that the future is set, that we are just actors on a stage destined to play the part we have been given.
Some say that all is chance, we live random lives like billiard balls ricocheting off each other in the universe.
I believe that there is so much more than preordained scripts or random acts that move us. I believe that we are connected, that our past cannot tell us who we are, and that the future is ours to write but that there is a destiny for each of us set forth from time immortal.
There are things in the past that I regret doing. I had two distinct encounters with the law in my past which has marred my record. I have had those things cleared from my official record but they affected who I could have been. The truth of it is that I could have been defined by those mistakes but chose to use those things that where meant for evil to be something to spur me on. Though I can never become a officer of the court or hold other jobs in the law enforcement sector I can do almost anything else. Those are things from my past that sought to tell me who I was. Every day society, family, friends, and the media seek to define us and tell us who we are and what we are to do. What choices to make and what things to believe. Years can go by taking us on a river of complacency while we wonder at what could have been.
Do not let the past be your future. I was once told the only mistakes are ones you don't learn from. Most of the time I seek to learn from my mistakes, sometimes I don't but I chose to move past those things that seek to tell me who I am and what this life is to be and instead move to pursue my destiny with both hands on the wheel, well sometimes with one hand and one hand out the window feeling the wind as it passes by! One of my favorite bands Three Doors Down in their song "It's the only one you've got" Brad Arnold screams out " your mistakes cannot define you now and tell you who your not, you've got to live this life you've been given like it's the only one you've got!"
Don't be afraid to fly!
There are things that scar us, pain we walk through which can overwhelm us to the point of depression and despair which the world, our own insecurities pile on us. There is a light hearted saying I live by, "if it don't kill you it just makes you stronger". Much of what happens to us we feel like it is going to kill us, maybe not literally but we feel that way. Often our feelings betray us because in the end though we may bear the scars of the battle we become all the more stronger because of the battle.
What battles are you in right now? Are you in the midst of pain or depression? Does it seem like the whole world is being piled on top of you? Maybe you have made a huge mistake and feel like you are never going to rise above it. Don't let these things hold you down. God doesn't define you by the mistakes you have made why should you?
Don't miss the future because of the could haves, should haves, but be defined by what can be and what could be.
God forgets the past when we come to Him in humility don't hold yourself back or let the world define you by your past, God doesn't.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Dear friends and family,
We wanted to send out an update to all our friends and family since our last newsletter went out.
A lot has happened in the past few months. Ellen and I have just recently taken over as the training directors with YWAM Salem. We have been serving with the training department here for the past three years as well as serving on the leadership team but this new appointment has happened in the past month.
Not only has this increased responsibility but also work load. Needless to say it has been stressful juggling home life as a father, husband, serving now as the training director, serving with the International DTS Centre, the North American Frontier Missions leadership team, helping lead the North American Go conference, and still pursuing my own initiatives like Engage.
Ellen is involved in discipling staff, helping with vision for our local work as well as Engage and continuing to home school the kids.
Currently we are overseeing a Fall and Winter Discipleship Training School. Our Korean DTS and Crossroads DTS. We are also currently establishing a English as a Second Language school and a teaching English as a second language seminar this summer.
Next year we are planning on starting a focus DTS called Engage DTS with a focus on issues of injustice. This coming year we are praying into focusing on the issue of human trafficking that will be happening around the upcoming 2010 World Cup in South Africa.
Amy McGee is also pioneering a Communications school next summer and Ellen and I are working on pioneering a School of Missions and Justice. This will be a frontline missions sending school with an emphasis on missions and injustice issues. We are looking at providing 6 month internships after the completion of the school.
As you can see we have a lot on our plate. We know God has challenged us in this season to take on all of this but we need your support and prayers to make it.
One huge answered prayer from our last newsletter came in the form of a donated 2000 Honda Odyssey from the Hsi family. Mark and Becky Hsi, our pastors from Hawaii just recently moved to Colorado Springs. As they were moving they felt led to donate their minivan to us after hearing about our old van breaking down. All we had to do was ship the car from Hawaii and the Hsi family even paid for half of the $1000 cost to ship! We are still in debt the shipping costs, if you are able to help with this please let us know.
We want to give a big mahalo to the Hsi ohana!
When it rains it pours, well, my faithful Dell laptop that lasted 6 years finally had a fatal hardware breakdown.
We need to purchase a new laptop, for what I do and the travel commitments this is a huge need. We are looking to raise around $600 for a mid grade replacement. If you are able to help with this need please contact us.
For financial donations make checks payable to YWAM with a note attached that it is for Amos and Ellen Hathway and mail to us:
5247 Chapman St. S
Salem, Or. 97306
Or:
PO Box 61700
Honolulu, Hi. 96839
Again, we want to thank our friends and famiy for your prayers and support these past 15 years in ministry serving with Youth With A Mission. We know these are uncertain times but one thing we can count on is the Rock of Jesus to see us through.
What does it mean to redefine yourself? I recently read an article that was printed in the Harvard review that talked about how in moving to a new job or career the need to reinvent/redefine yourself through story. I found it interesting that it isn’t so much in what we say but in how we tell the story that engages others to our cause.
Where are you at? I find that we are coming into a time to reawaken, rediscover, and reinvent not only ourselves but that which we work towards. It isn’t so much that we are radically changing who or what we are, we may be moving in a different direction but if we are to advance personally, relationally, and in what we do we have to tell the story in a new way to engage others.
If you have listened at all to Switchfoots newest album “O Gravity” this is one of the messages they are sending. We see fear in the headlines, we see uncertainty in our economy, we can’t trust the products we use, and our leaders don’t have any answers. We are like a car that has run out of gas and is trying to coast down a hill to make it to the next gas station. There isn’t anything powering our engine any longer but we are still carried forward on inertia. There isn’t anything wrong with the car; it is what we haven’t put in it that has gotten us to this place. We got so comfortable with where at that we neglected the basics. This is where we find the story of our lives, we need to do something different or maybe do what we are doing but in a new way meaning we tell the story differently. The church in the west is in this place and in many instances I believe YWAM is in this place.
The issue isn’t in radically changing the core foundational values, if anything we need to get back to those, it is in redefining ourselves as YWAM bases or ministry locations and in ourselves as YWAMers. We have tried to put systems and structure to what we are and have become comfortable in that, we have gotten institutionalized. Now for those who lived during the hippy movement of the 60’s “institutional” is a dirty word. I am not so sure that having a part of YWAM or the U of N becoming institutionalized to accomplish the goal of discipling the nations bad. But we need to be careful that YWAM doesn’t loose the anointing is has of being an apostolic “movement” primarily and an institution secondarily. What is happening now is that our “movement” in many areas has become comfortable and settled in how we do things.
During what many of us walked through in leadership in YWAM called “realignment” much of the major drift was arrested but there is much work to be done if we are to really move into a new apostolic season. I am sure there are pockets and bright spots on the horizon but as a whole, who are we? Where are you at personally?
Tom Bloomer brought a word at the last GLT meetings reaffirming the fact that we had lost 10 years and now have crossed the Jordon. For those of us who are in our early to late thirty’s, who have served in the mission less than the 20+ years that our older brothers and sisters have would beg to differ and for myself honestly disagree with the word, at least for us.
We began this journey on the other side of the Jordon waiting for the mission to catch up. I have had the privilege of working with a ministry called the Factory that was started with a vision, a passion of seeing a global awakening moving out into all the nations and into every sphere of society. This “movement” was started nearly 10 years ago and though those of us involved in the Factory are scattered all over the world the network remains. To say that for most of my time in the mission was a loss does not resonate with what I have felt nor what I have seen and have been working towards in the last 10 years.
The real issue being explored now is how do we as a whole mission which is multigenerational, multiethnic, and multi denominational movement move forward into what Jim Stier is calling the 4th wave of missions. What are we going to look like as a mission? What were taboo subjects just a few years ago like “Business as a Mission” are now coming into vogue with our leadership. Will we as a mission be able to stay a “movement” as a whole or will be look for the comfortable path of least resistance? I believe there is no limit to where God can take this mission and that the DNA, our foundation is laid on solid ground but those of us who will be leading the mission in the future need to engage with what God is doing now and pick up our own cross and carry it. A friend of mine and one of the founders of the mission, Al Akimoff, made this statement at the North American Go Conference last year. “Don’t expect me to pass on the baton, get your own baton, you will have to pry my baton out of my cold dead hands!”
That is where it is at, don’t wait around for and older leader to pass things off on you, pick up your own baton, add your vision to this movement called YWAM.
Here are the lyrics from Switchfoots song Faust, Midas, and Myself.
This one’s about a dream
I had last night
How an old man tracked me home
And stepped inside
He put his foot inside the door
And gave a crooked smile
Something in his eyes
Something in his laugh
Something in his voice
That made my skin crawl off
He said, “I’ve seen you here before
I know your name.
You could have your pick
Of pretty things.
You could have it all
Everything at once.
Everything you’ve seen,
Everything you’ll need,
Everything you’ve ever had in fantasies.”
“You’ve one life,
You’ve one life.
You’ve one life left to lead.”
I woke up from my dream
As a golden man
With a girl I’ve never seen
With golden skin
I jumped up to my feet
She asked me what was wrong
I began to scream
I don’t think this is me
Is this just a dream
Or really happening?
What direction?
What direction?
I’m splitting up!
I’m splitting up!
This is my personal disaffection
What direction? What direction?
What direction now?
I looked outside the glass
At golden shores
Golden ships and masts
With golden cords
As my reflection passed
I hated what I saw
My golden eyes were dead
And a thought passed through my head
A heart that is made of gold can’t really beat at all
I wanted to wake up again
Without a touch of gold
What direction?
Death or action!
Life begins at the intersection.
I woke up as before
But the gold was gone
My wife was at the door
With her night robe on
My heart beat once or twice
And life flooded my veins
Everything had changed
My lungs had found their voice
And what was once routine
And what was once routine was now the perfect joy
You’ve one life
You’ve one life
One life left to lead
For us as YWAMers it is not in our DNA to do the same thing in same ways. Isn’t one of our sayings “new things in new ways”?
Life begins at the intersection, which road are you going to take?
The strength of the discipleship training program is not in our amazing structures, our strength of logistics, or our polished training. It is the anointing of the DTS as part of Youth with a Mission and our strength as a mission to develop relationship through the process of discipleship and the impartation of the DNA and foundational values through the relationship/discipleship process.
The anointing in the DTS is in the process. We look at the DTS program as an all encompassing thing. It is not a then B then C; C may come before A if God says so. We see the DTS as a “live/learn environment” where 90% of what happens isn’t in the classroom but in the rooms, during work duties, around the meals. We see the DTS in the context of all of us are going there, jump on and lets go together. We are in the process of discipleship, of becoming more Christ like, together. There is no division between staff and student in this regard. The staff are to facilitate and coach the students toward knowing God and making Him known but at the same time we are on the journey together. We notice throughout the Bible that God is far more interested in individuals and in the process rather than the outcome; it’s as if He already knows the outcome but wants to see how we will get there. He wants us to discover His dreams and want to do them.
Let’s look at the way the DTS is supposed to relate to the local base through the lens of relationship. When we see the DTS as just another program the base runs or just the place we get secondary school students or future base staff, or if the DTS is looked at as the main money maker of a base then we have lost the idea that the DTS is the foundation of any base.
At the foundation of any base should be a strong DTS. In fact, show me a strong or weak DTS and I will show you a strong or weak base. We should see that there is a strong relationship between the DTS and the rest of the base.
I have also seen the dynamic of inter DTS relationships strengthening all the schools in a region. In Hawaii we spent years cultivating and developing relationships between leaders and schools in the islands. To this day even though all of us that where involved in developing the DTS network in Hawaii have moved on to other things that network of relationships remain.Connecting the schools and leaders through DTS combined staff training times, DTS gatherings, events such as the Go conference in North America, and informal DTS leaders meetings all work towards uniting to build up all schools which in turn build up the bases they relate to.
As the GLT has been discussing the new emerging matrix of ministries, how the transnational relate to the regional, ect. We see that this building of relationships is what continues to make YWAM what it is. It is not in our overwhelming well structured organization; it is built and strengthened through our relationships. As we work our way backwards I propose that this all begins with the entry into YWAM at the DTS level. O yes it is developed and refined through years of working together in a common interest but it all starts for all of us with a DTS. How much value do we put in developing relationship between staff and students, between students and students, between the DTS and the rest of the base and so on up to the GLT.
We see some of the new emerging leadership matrix within YWAM reflecting relationship and family being the uniting factor not necessarily positions. i.e. Global networks and global ministries. We see the new leadership structure of Team 3 working in this way. In every way as YWAMers relationship is our strength.
As we have been looking at the “One Man” passage in Philippians we see the importance of being of one mind. Paul asked the church of Philippi that if he has anything he can do to convince them that this unity, this oneness of relationship is what they should strive for above all else. Paul says that “
Philippians 1:27 (NRSV)
27Only, live your life in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that, whether I come and see you or am absent and hear about you, I will know that you are standing firm in one spirit, striving side by side with one mind for the faith of the gospel”
He points out that Jesus had this same attitude. Jesus was in such a love relationship with the Godhead and in such a love relationship with us, His creation, He so wanted to restore relationship with His creation that he was obedient to death on a cross.
If this issue of relationship, this issue of being of One Man in Christ was important to Paul and to God Himself how much more should we strive for this.
There is a quote from a movie The Gladiator that is a spiritual truth “What we do in life echoes in eternity.”
It really doesn’t matter what your theological view on what our role will be in the coming kingdom, what we do here makes a difference. How we pursue Gods dreams, how much we value what He values, how much we invest in those around us echoes in eternity.
Processing:
1. Identify who in your relationship circle weather in a DTS staff position, IDTS centre leadership position, or in another context in which you are in a mentorship/discipleship relationship with.
b. how have you been doing in this role?
c. If possible, are you in a place to be disciplining students through relationship and how are you doing?
2. Are there people in your circles that God may be challenging you to develop a relationship with weather this is in a peer type setting or a
discipleship/mentorship setting? (be intentional)
3. Are you in a significant peer relationship that provides accountability and challenge in your personal life?
a. if not identify one person you can approach to develop a relationship of accountability
Maybe it is just me but I’ve been feeling stuck. Well maybe stuck isn’t a good word, slowed down, mired, hedged in may be better descriptions. There is a passion that burns in my heart to see a global awakening in this generation, to see every nation, every level of society, and every sphere transformed. You may say that seems like a tall order to fill even for the apostil Paul. I say it isn’t. Paul did see it happen in His day and we are still feeling the effects of His prayers. I was talking to a friend of mine a few days ago and we where recalling a time, a season, about six or seven years ago that we felt this movement beginning to really take shape, you could feel it in every worship time. You talked about it whenever you got together and prayed about it whenever you had a chance. Looking back now there are choices, attacks of the enemy, or random circumstance that seem to have gotten in the way. Is that truth or is it something within each of us? Have we gotten tired, old, or in some way slowed down in this dream of revival? I recently got a devotional from a good friend Krista Harris whom we have worked with as part of the Factory team. She talked about Gods guidance in this way that “when you can’t trace His hand, trust His heart”. There are times when His path is blindingly obvious and it is almost impossible to miss His leading. You can sense it at every turn and almost taste heaven in every worship time and every meeting, where you can see the lines in His hand it is so clear. But there are other times in our lives that you can barely see the next step. That when you can’t trace the lines in His hand you must trust His heart. This spoke to me so clearly not only in where Ellen and I are in our own lives but in the season we all seem to be in. I am not saying that awesome things are not happening and that all of Christendom is in a funk but that as a whole, we seem to be slowed down. In the central valley of California there is a weather effect called tully fog which is a fog so dense that often you literally can’t see your hand in front of your face. When I was in Junior High in southern Cal we lived on a lake, there were times that we had this type of fog off of the lake. One morning I walked out of the house to go to meet the bus that would take me to school and I found myself following the yellow line on the side of the road just to walk to where the bus usually picked me up. I could almost not see my hand in front of my face. I feel that for whatever reason, the enemy, circumstance, or our own choices, we are in a season such as this. The thing about this kind of fog is that it doesn’t last long. The fog layer is often very thin and it doesn’t take much more than the full light of day to burn it off. I believe that the full light of day is soon to come. My hope is that we don’t get in a massive wreck because we are trying to drive too fast before it burns off. I sense we need to take our time, not to shrink back but to slowly but steadily move forward preparing our selves for the moment the fog is lifted. We must be ready for that time though, we must be prepared. For when it comes it may be blinding, we may not be able to see for a moment for the beauty of it all but we must be ready to take action.
Have you touched heaven yet? Have you been lifted into a place of utter contentment, peace, the throne room of the Christ? What is the expression of that? 300 jumping, pumping, screaming youth crying for holiness and passion, for the awakening of this generation while guitars scream and drums beat. Is it on a mountaintop with the whisper of heaven blowing through the trees, where nature itself cries out! Is it on the sand of a beach with the roar of oceans voice beating on the gates to the kingdom crying out for the redemption of the ages to come, to come quickly. With the rustling of ancient prayers in the tops of the palm trees waving their praises. Could it be in the midst of a coffee shop where the kingdom comes, headphones on the praise of a generation longing for the time, now is the time. O Jesus let it come. Don’t you feel His heart beat in the midst of the city, on the street corners, on the bustling Indian train, in the hum of humanity on a warm summers night. Can you see it coming on a trail high in the Himalayas, on the shores of Lake Isikkol, along a dusty road in the Philippines? O people worship in the mountain, on the street, in the Factory, on your knees, worship is in the heart and its expression lifts even the most downtrodden heart to the eyes of our Lord. “for the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord, as the waters cover the sea” May our worship to our God cover the earth as the waters cover the sea, and may our praise fill the throne room of the most high. Praise His name all you saints.
I am beginning to understand what the creation means to God the father, to Jesus, to the Holy Spirit, what we really mean to Him. As I was on a trip recently thinking about my little girl, how her smile can disarm even the most stern look. How even when she cries’s tears of frustration it brings laughter to my heart. When I think of my son, whom looks so much like me, it brings me to tears and my heart leaps within me. His smile and laughter is like the rising of the son and the setting of the same. I am wrapped up in them. The thought of them suffering because of sin breaks me, it brings me down. What would I do if I gained the whole world but lost them? What kind of father, what kind of teacher would I be? God’s heart is wrapped up in us His creation. Jesus just breaks at the thought of us hurting or of us walking away from Him. When He thinks of us, of you and I, His heart leaps! Can you feel it? Our undivided devotion and love out of a pure, innocent heart is all He wants, all He desires. There is nothing we can do to earn that, nothing else to do besides be who He created us to be. When He looks on us the sun rises and sets…on us. We are His all in all and the reason for life. To have a relationship where we say Abba Father! O how I long to hear that from my children it is all I need and want at the end of the day. All else is wasted time; all else is as a vapor that is like the dew in the morning that is gone at the rising of the Son. When I am away from them I want to be near them. When I am near them I don’t want to be away. That is the groaning of all creation, to be brought home. He is completely wrapped up in us and it would break Him to loose us. There is nothing He wouldn’t do to keep us near. May we know the love of the Father. May our hearts break over separation and that we would not rest until we are truly home surrounded by those we love and that love us. “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous. Love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly. It does not seek is own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness but rejoices with the truth. Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”
